The news of the interview travelled fast indeed. found out this morning that the General Manager knew that I said something that I shouldn't have said yesterday. That was still fine, knowing how the people here work. Then bumped into our director, he asked me this:
Director: "Lee Tiow Aun, you dont eat shark fins ar?"
ahtiow: "No, since many years ago. You still eat them?"
Director: "Yes."
ahtiow: "You should stop."
This was when I turned around to walk off, he did the same. He took a step and turned back,
Director:" But I have a different opinion then you"
ahtiow: "Yeah..?"
Director: "I agree with your view that sharks are not as scary as we think. But if we dont eat shark fins, the shark population will grow, and the smaller fishes will be getting lesser."
ahtiow: "That's one of the biggest misconception that everyone have. That's why people dont care so much for the sharks!The shark population has been getting less and less and more and more people can start to afford to eat shark fins "
....We kept this on for a while at which point I cant recall what exactly what we said cause I was kinda pissed and cant believe that those words actually come from him (I think he did said something about people are turning to rays for fins and people should start to farm sharks for fins and how we should be careful not to say something in public that will piss off the restaurant operators)...... What I do recall is this sentence that I said that kinda shut him up: "The sharks has survived for 400 million years, with 3 major extinctions, the dinosaurs and other animals have been wiped out, yet the sharks survived, there must be a reason for the sharks to be here!" ...after which he was mumbling a bit or he did said something which I didnt hear clearly.....and the conversation kinda end with these:
Director: "Yeah, but I still think the theory doesnt hold"
ahtiow: "You can believe your own theory and I have my stand for this matter..... "...after which with a forced small smile I turned and walked away, head spinning, pulse racing and pissed, and above all, utter disbelief.
Well, this kinda sums up the place that I am working at and under whose direction and supervision I am working for now.
Now, for the little bit of good things that happened today, which saved my day, BIG TIME...!! Was conducting a dive with the sharks programme for a non-certified diver, an Indian national. Statistics and previous experiences have told us that Indian nationals are the worst participants a dive guide could ever have. My this participant, I found out later when we hit the water, almost drowned himself in a couple of occasions in his younger days. He is doing this to overcome his fear of drowning. He kept coming out of the water even though everything was fine. Did all I could to distract him from being too conscious of being in the water lest the fear creeps back in, I managed to get him through the dive with minor hiccups here and there. The look of satisfaction and gratitude on his face when he took off his mask after we surfaced was simply priceless.....he thanked me profusely and I kept saying, No problem, welcome, just doing my job, you've done great! , bla bla bla....but deep inside, I am thanking him in return for turning my day around from the crap that happened in the morning.
Tired, a bit sleepy and most of all satisfied to the max after a good dinner,
ahtiow
Tuesday, June 2, 2009
Monday, June 1, 2009
ahtiow is bitchin'!!
was interviewed today by one of the internet tv at my workplace today (and if you guys are trying to figure out which programme it was, sorry, i wont tell until i see the actual footage, sorry guys, wanna preserve whatever teeny tiny bit of dignity i still have after today's and sigh....tomorrow's ordeals....) . Think I sucked big time for the interview. I've always known I cant do crap in front of a camera, somemore what with a microphone pointed to me with a videolight. Sigh....if only I could convince my boss that I am not the perfect candidate for the piece.
Anyway, the interview was about how the current recession affects a niche job market as mine i.e. Marine Biologist. It started off quite easily, they sent me 8 easy questions beforehand which were
(1) Why did you choose this job?
I chose this job for the love of marine life. I hope to raise public awareness of the importance and roles of the marine environment and marine life.
(2) What do you like about the job?
I like the fast-paced and exciting environment of our job. I enjoy working with the animals, the team and the general public.
(3) What did you have to study to get here? Was it tough?
I have a degree in Marine Science, from the University of Malaysia, Sabah. It was not tough because I loved what I studied. It was fun actually!
(4) Where can one get a degree in Marine Biology in Singapore?
There is no specific Marine Biology degree in Singapore as yet. There are related modules that can be taken at NUS - eg. Coral Reef Ecology, Life Form & Marine Biology module.
(5) In recession times, how is a niche job like this affected?
We are not affected. Recession or not, the animals will still need to be taken care of.
(6) What other unusual roles are there at Underwater World?
We need to conduct water parameter tests, treatments procedures, dive programmes, and conceptualise new exhibits and ideas, etc.
(7) What are your favourite moments at UWS (in your work)?
My favourite moments are:
- the birth of our baby sharks-leopard sharks with white tips/black tips,
- when we managed to educate the dive programme participants that sharks are not as scary as it was portrayed in some movies.
(8) What are the challenges at work?
The challenges are:
- to keep the water quality in the tanks at their optimum quality for animal health,
- to recognise problems/disease before an actual outbreak and to do something to prevent it,
- to raise public awareness of the importance of marine life.
but the reporters were so freaking efficient that she came up with new questions in response to my answers to the previous questions and I end up talking too much. So much so that I knew when I finished my sentence that those will get deleted by the upper people. I knew I was there to speak on behalf of 'an ideal' Marine Biologist in 'an ideal' working environment. Not to speak my mind and my overly personal grudge against shark finning. I know I know......yada yada......
And tomorrow will be another play to put up for something else, and inevitably, they need 5 persons for the show tomorrow, and once again I am in the list simply because my roster allows me to be available at that particular time when they need 'the extras' for the show........
Vi told me this in reply of my text to her bitching about my day "It's just another job lo...." I know.....It's just another of the workload.....and I also know that sometimes it is better to scream it all out rather than keep it inside....so here I am, bitching like a sissy over trivial stuff. Big deal. Fuck me.
ahtiow
Anyway, the interview was about how the current recession affects a niche job market as mine i.e. Marine Biologist. It started off quite easily, they sent me 8 easy questions beforehand which were
(1) Why did you choose this job?
I chose this job for the love of marine life. I hope to raise public awareness of the importance and roles of the marine environment and marine life.
(2) What do you like about the job?
I like the fast-paced and exciting environment of our job. I enjoy working with the animals, the team and the general public.
(3) What did you have to study to get here? Was it tough?
I have a degree in Marine Science, from the University of Malaysia, Sabah. It was not tough because I loved what I studied. It was fun actually!
(4) Where can one get a degree in Marine Biology in Singapore?
There is no specific Marine Biology degree in Singapore as yet. There are related modules that can be taken at NUS - eg. Coral Reef Ecology, Life Form & Marine Biology module.
(5) In recession times, how is a niche job like this affected?
We are not affected. Recession or not, the animals will still need to be taken care of.
(6) What other unusual roles are there at Underwater World?
We need to conduct water parameter tests, treatments procedures, dive programmes, and conceptualise new exhibits and ideas, etc.
(7) What are your favourite moments at UWS (in your work)?
My favourite moments are:
- the birth of our baby sharks-leopard sharks with white tips/black tips,
- when we managed to educate the dive programme participants that sharks are not as scary as it was portrayed in some movies.
(8) What are the challenges at work?
The challenges are:
- to keep the water quality in the tanks at their optimum quality for animal health,
- to recognise problems/disease before an actual outbreak and to do something to prevent it,
- to raise public awareness of the importance of marine life.
but the reporters were so freaking efficient that she came up with new questions in response to my answers to the previous questions and I end up talking too much. So much so that I knew when I finished my sentence that those will get deleted by the upper people. I knew I was there to speak on behalf of 'an ideal' Marine Biologist in 'an ideal' working environment. Not to speak my mind and my overly personal grudge against shark finning. I know I know......yada yada......
And tomorrow will be another play to put up for something else, and inevitably, they need 5 persons for the show tomorrow, and once again I am in the list simply because my roster allows me to be available at that particular time when they need 'the extras' for the show........
Vi told me this in reply of my text to her bitching about my day "It's just another job lo...." I know.....It's just another of the workload.....and I also know that sometimes it is better to scream it all out rather than keep it inside....so here I am, bitching like a sissy over trivial stuff. Big deal. Fuck me.
ahtiow
Tuesday, May 26, 2009
untitled
Doing everything that I believe in
Going by the rules that I've been taught
More understanding of what's around me
And protected from the walls of love
All that you see is me
And all I truly believe
That I was born to try
I've learned to love
Be understanding
And believe in life
But you've got to make choices
Be wrong or right
Sometimes you've got to sacrifice the things you like
But I was born to try
No point in talking what you should have been
And regretting the things that went on
Life's full of mistakes, destinies and fate
Remove the clouds look at the bigger picture
And all that you see is me
And all I truly believe
That I was born to try
I've learned to love
Be understanding
And believe in life
But you've got to make choices
Be wrong or right
Sometimes you've got to sacrifice the things you like
But I was born to try
All that you see is me
All I truly believe
All that you see is me
And all I truly believe
That I was born to try
I've learned to love
Be understanding
And believe in life
But you've got to make choices
Be wrong or right
Sometimes you've got to sacrifice the things you like
But I was born to try
But you've got to make choices
Be wrong or right
Sometimes you've got to sacrifice the things you like
But I was born to try
Born to try - Delta Goodrem
Going by the rules that I've been taught
More understanding of what's around me
And protected from the walls of love
All that you see is me
And all I truly believe
That I was born to try
I've learned to love
Be understanding
And believe in life
But you've got to make choices
Be wrong or right
Sometimes you've got to sacrifice the things you like
But I was born to try
No point in talking what you should have been
And regretting the things that went on
Life's full of mistakes, destinies and fate
Remove the clouds look at the bigger picture
And all that you see is me
And all I truly believe
That I was born to try
I've learned to love
Be understanding
And believe in life
But you've got to make choices
Be wrong or right
Sometimes you've got to sacrifice the things you like
But I was born to try
All that you see is me
All I truly believe
All that you see is me
And all I truly believe
That I was born to try
I've learned to love
Be understanding
And believe in life
But you've got to make choices
Be wrong or right
Sometimes you've got to sacrifice the things you like
But I was born to try
But you've got to make choices
Be wrong or right
Sometimes you've got to sacrifice the things you like
But I was born to try
Born to try - Delta Goodrem
Sunday, May 24, 2009
reminisced, emo-ed....
was looking at some photos of us together on my phone. we were so lovely together. so much in love with each other. the way you put your arms around me, the silly poses and expressions you put when you were with me, the closeness of us 2 lovebirds being together on a world of our own, yeah, those were good times and we both moved on from that. the 2 voice recordings you recorded on my phone were so full of fun and love. time is an amazing thing. changes are inevitable. We have both decided to move on and its our responsibility to ourselves now to make things better. Make it the next best thing to happen to both of us after the 'us' in the past.
reminisced, emo-ed, written down the emotions, and now lighter....
ahtiow
reminisced, emo-ed, written down the emotions, and now lighter....
ahtiow
Saturday, May 16, 2009
Be beautiful.
was at a malay bridal fashion show last nite. was there from 4pm till 10pm. saw the preparations, the making ups, the table arrangements, the talks by the big shot, the waitings of the models to get their faces drawn, and all the usual hullaballoos of an event such as this. got a lil bored, sat there looking, observing. was wondering what time did the make up artist and the models started to get ready for the night's event? 2pm? 12 noon? or earlier than that? all for the 10 mins of catwalk down a makeshift red carpet with 12 other models. Will all the eyes be on you? or its your own eyes thats on you all the time? being self-concious cos you are supposed to be so?
the thing that struck me to think of all these was: those models are not professional models. neither do I think the make up artist is (who is a friend of my friend who brought me in to document his works). I wouldnt have think this much if these people are pros, being paid to do all these stuff. Those so called models last night were just there for being beautiful and glamorous for the 10 mins and get some nice pictures to show their friends and family and for keepsake. is this really what they need? to be beautiful for a brief period of time? Do we have to dress up 2 hrs earlier for a dinner at a fancy restaurant, being self-concious all the time cos we think we are to be observed by people around our table and those that we walked past? won't they be too busy doing these same things that you are doing to pay enough attention to you? another wonders of things that us humans do.
They'll be making sure you stay amused
They'll fill you up with drugs and booze
Maybe you'll make the evening news
And when you're tripping
over your dreams
They'll keep you down by any means
and by the end of the night
you'll be stifling your screams
Since you became a VIPerson
It's like your problems have all worsened
Your paranoia casts aspersions
On the truths you know
And they'll just put you in the spotlight
And hope that you'll do alright
Or maybe not
Now why do you wanna go
and put starz in their eyes?
Why do you wanna go
and put starz in their eyes?
So why do you wanna go
and put starz in their eyes?
Now why do you wanna go
and put starz in their eyes?
"Starz in Their Eyes" - Just Jack
Cheers
ahtiow
the thing that struck me to think of all these was: those models are not professional models. neither do I think the make up artist is (who is a friend of my friend who brought me in to document his works). I wouldnt have think this much if these people are pros, being paid to do all these stuff. Those so called models last night were just there for being beautiful and glamorous for the 10 mins and get some nice pictures to show their friends and family and for keepsake. is this really what they need? to be beautiful for a brief period of time? Do we have to dress up 2 hrs earlier for a dinner at a fancy restaurant, being self-concious all the time cos we think we are to be observed by people around our table and those that we walked past? won't they be too busy doing these same things that you are doing to pay enough attention to you? another wonders of things that us humans do.
They'll be making sure you stay amused
They'll fill you up with drugs and booze
Maybe you'll make the evening news
And when you're tripping
over your dreams
They'll keep you down by any means
and by the end of the night
you'll be stifling your screams
Since you became a VIPerson
It's like your problems have all worsened
Your paranoia casts aspersions
On the truths you know
And they'll just put you in the spotlight
And hope that you'll do alright
Or maybe not
Now why do you wanna go
and put starz in their eyes?
Why do you wanna go
and put starz in their eyes?
So why do you wanna go
and put starz in their eyes?
Now why do you wanna go
and put starz in their eyes?
"Starz in Their Eyes" - Just Jack
Cheers
ahtiow
Monday, April 27, 2009
lost
lost
adj.
1. Unable to find one's way: a lost child.
2.
a. No longer in the possession, care, or control of someone or something
b. No longer in existence; vanished or spent
c. No longer known or practiced: a lost art.
d. Beyond reach, communication, or influence
3. Not used to one's benefit or advantage: a lost opportunity.
been doing some thinking. where do I belong? Singapore? Teluk Intan? Kota? Mabul? or neither? or all? Or should I really need an answer to this? The food that I loved in TI tasted different now, the drinks sucks big time in TI, weather sucks. Cant help wondering where do I fit? How should I fit? I'm kinda lost now. Is it ok to be lost at where I am now?
adj.
1. Unable to find one's way: a lost child.
2.
a. No longer in the possession, care, or control of someone or something
b. No longer in existence; vanished or spent
c. No longer known or practiced: a lost art.
d. Beyond reach, communication, or influence
3. Not used to one's benefit or advantage: a lost opportunity.
been doing some thinking. where do I belong? Singapore? Teluk Intan? Kota? Mabul? or neither? or all? Or should I really need an answer to this? The food that I loved in TI tasted different now, the drinks sucks big time in TI, weather sucks. Cant help wondering where do I fit? How should I fit? I'm kinda lost now. Is it ok to be lost at where I am now?
Wednesday, April 15, 2009
update on 14.04.2009
realised it has been almost a month since I updated this blog. well, to put it plainly, the past weeks has been fun. been going out with frens for movies, drinks, outings, and stuff. crazy bunch of wackos. fun loving but yet not crazy type of fun lovers. so its still ok. been spending more than previously, but still manageable.
something happened today, my favorite nephew was involved in a bike accident. fractured his leg. his parents rushed back to hometown to see him. sent a msg to the one person who i could talk to about almost anything and everything, yet didnt get a reply from her. guess she was sleeping. things have been improving since the last few months since we broke up, i have more time for my family, my friends, my photography, and i dont think of her much, and yes, if you are wondering, it doesnt hurt anymore, at least not at much as to think of it as painful.things happened and passed, we move on. and that's what I am doing now. I hope she is too. It is only painful when I see how she still hasnt gotten over it and still hasnt find what she really wants yet. I only did cried once since the official breakup when kit told me that her mum and family misses me and her mum is still worried about me after all these months. yes, i do miss them too. when it comes to time like this, i do miss how easy I could talk to her and i can picture her expessions, her body gestures and how her responses will be if she is here with me tonight.
had a conversation earlier today with dad, he was asking if I have a new girlfriend yet. no, I said. wanna enjoy single life for sometime more before I commit myself again. come to think of it, its not really the reason. reason is I dont know where i'll be going from here and when and how. I've been saying I dont want to stay here for long, but how soon can I leave here? to where exactly? what should I do next ? should I really go back and set up the bridal studio at hometown? somehow, there's still a nagging from my inner self that portraiture photography, especially bridal studio type may not be what i really want to do and can do. yet, its the more convenient way out for me, since my partners have the capital to back me up and I can be back to my family at home and settle at my home where I can really start to treat it as home again after almost 7 years of travelling. I could never treat my room at home as really my own room. it was and still has always been more like a hotel room for me when I am back home during holidays. and I guess its time for me to spend more time with my dad since my family says his memories are slowing down lately. if i am home i can send him to places he want to go rather than he ride his own bike. yet, this whole partnership may not work. guess its only fair that things are not always laid out for you nicely, its you who put all the pieces together and make them work and keep working at them to make sure they still works fine.
I need someone, and yet not anyone.
ahtiow
something happened today, my favorite nephew was involved in a bike accident. fractured his leg. his parents rushed back to hometown to see him. sent a msg to the one person who i could talk to about almost anything and everything, yet didnt get a reply from her. guess she was sleeping. things have been improving since the last few months since we broke up, i have more time for my family, my friends, my photography, and i dont think of her much, and yes, if you are wondering, it doesnt hurt anymore, at least not at much as to think of it as painful.things happened and passed, we move on. and that's what I am doing now. I hope she is too. It is only painful when I see how she still hasnt gotten over it and still hasnt find what she really wants yet. I only did cried once since the official breakup when kit told me that her mum and family misses me and her mum is still worried about me after all these months. yes, i do miss them too. when it comes to time like this, i do miss how easy I could talk to her and i can picture her expessions, her body gestures and how her responses will be if she is here with me tonight.
had a conversation earlier today with dad, he was asking if I have a new girlfriend yet. no, I said. wanna enjoy single life for sometime more before I commit myself again. come to think of it, its not really the reason. reason is I dont know where i'll be going from here and when and how. I've been saying I dont want to stay here for long, but how soon can I leave here? to where exactly? what should I do next ? should I really go back and set up the bridal studio at hometown? somehow, there's still a nagging from my inner self that portraiture photography, especially bridal studio type may not be what i really want to do and can do. yet, its the more convenient way out for me, since my partners have the capital to back me up and I can be back to my family at home and settle at my home where I can really start to treat it as home again after almost 7 years of travelling. I could never treat my room at home as really my own room. it was and still has always been more like a hotel room for me when I am back home during holidays. and I guess its time for me to spend more time with my dad since my family says his memories are slowing down lately. if i am home i can send him to places he want to go rather than he ride his own bike. yet, this whole partnership may not work. guess its only fair that things are not always laid out for you nicely, its you who put all the pieces together and make them work and keep working at them to make sure they still works fine.
I need someone, and yet not anyone.
ahtiow
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